Day 4 of 365
He was infatuated by the fact that he was pursued but was never interested in pursuing especially not her. He liked the attention he was given
like we all dobut his craving for attention almost gave him a sense of entitlement like he expected everyone to recognize his beauty and accept the fact they could never have him emotionally. He enjoyed playing with feelings. He would safeguard his heart, mind and soul but would free his body to any loose spirit.Why?
Because he could.
She hated him. She hated the fact she couldn't have him. She hated that in his eyes she could never be as good enough for him. She hated that he couldn't see she was one of a kind, that her love was rare, copyrighted to just her
and who she chose to share it with.
So deep, it overflowed through tears and words when she spoke with passion.
Then she started to hate herself.
When has that kind of love been demonstrated to herself? Not from him.
Evidently not from herself either.
She thought if she loved herself enough why would she need validation from someone else's heart and mouth to convince her that she is everything?
The moon and stars.
Since when did anyone's inability to see her worth decrease her value?
Should she let anyone, let alone a male choose how she views herself?
Why is it that she felt she could only hear of her beauty through someone else's words?
And when those words proved null when it came to actions that it was due to her unworthiness?
It didn't add up in her head.
She became frustrated, angry with herself. She had been forever fighting with herself within. Then loneliness befriended her, gave her company.
The type of company that encouraged to rely on anybody else but herself.
To waste countless amount of time and energy scouting for that person she could entrust her everything with, even her being.
Her existence.
Little did she know that person she longed for was herself.
-Thanai
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